Capital Reviews

 The Coffee Table [movie] EH, THIS IS ANXIETY BASED HORROR MOVIE AND THAT IS A GENRE THAT ODVIOUSLY WORKS WELL ON ME, BUT THIS GOT TO VERY THREE'S COMPANY LEVELS WITHOUT THERE BEING ENOUGH TO IT. I DIDN'T DISLIKE IT BUT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER. PS. I FEEL LIKE IT WAS DRIVING ME CRAZY THAT I COULD NOT AT ANY POINT ENVISION WHAT HAPPENED. LIKE, 'WHAT HAPPENED' IS VERY OBVIOUS AND BRUTAL. THE WHOLE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES, BUT IT WAS MAKING ME CRAZY THAT I CAN NOT ENVISION EXACTLY HOW THE EVENT WENT. LIKE, SOMEONE NEEDS TO DRAW ME A VECTOR DIAGRAM OF HOW IT WORKED. LIKE, I KNOW THEY WANTED THE MOST GRUESOME THING THEY COULD THINK OF TO HAPPEN, BUT LIKE.... HOW. WHAT MOTION WAS HE DOING? I FEEL LIKE THIS QUESTION TAINTED MY ABILITY TO WATCH THIS ENTIRE MOVIE! 

 Wizard of Earthsea [book, audiobook] I READ THIS BOOK WHEN I WAS LIKE 13 AND HATED IT, JUST *HATED* IT. BUT IT'S CLEARLY A BOOK I SHOULD LIKE BY AN AUTHOR I LOVE SO I DECIDED TO GIVE IT ANOTHER CHANCE TO AT LEAST UNDERSTAND WHAT RUBBED ME SO MUCH THE WRONG WAY.  I THINK A LOT OF IT WAS JUST NOT RELATING WELL TO THE TEEN CHARACTER AND HIS WRONG DECISIONS FRUSTRATING ME SINCE EVERYTHING HE DID SEEMED SO UNFORCED.  I THINK THE LARGER REASON WAS I REALLY HATED FANTASY BOOKS AT THE TIME AND LARGELY HATED READING THEM BECAUSE OF FANTASY NAMES AND THIS BOOK IS ABOUT NAMES SPECIFICALLY SO EVERYONE HAS 30 DIFFERENT STUPID FANTASY NAMES AND I THINK I HYPERBOLICALLY LATCHED ONTO THAT AS THIS BOOK BEING THE SPECIFIC EXAMPLE OF WHY I HATE FANTASY. READING THIS DECADES LATER IT'S NOT SO BAD AND I'LL PROBABLY CONTINUE THE SERIES.  PS. THIS BOOK *DOES* HAVE GEB FROM GONT WHO IS FIGHTING A GEBBETH WHO IS ALSO NAMED GEB SO I CAN'T TOTALLY SAY I WAS WRONG ABOUT THE NAMES OF EVERYTHING BE

 Late Night With the Devil [movie] YEAH, THIS IS GOOD. THE STORY AND PLOT WAS GOOD BUT I FEEL LIKE THE PART THAT WAS GREAT WAS WVWRY FAKE 70S THING. LIKE TITLE CARDS AND THE CAMERA WORK ON THE LITTLE CUT AWAY. EVERYONE HAD VERY SEVENTIES NAMES.  PS. I WASNT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT I SAW THE TV GLOW INCASE IT WAS THIS MOVIE 

 Day of the Animals [movie, mst3k] THIS MOVIE RULES. IF YOU WANT TO WATCH A BAD MOVIE THIS IS A GREAT BAD MOVIE. IT'S LESLIE NELSON IN A 1977 MEDIUM BUDGET MOVIE WITH BASICALLY THE SAME PLOT AS BIRDEMIC BUT ALL ANIMALS. IT HAS A LOT OF EXTREMELY SILLY SCENES WHERE THEY THROW RATS AT A GUY OR A BIRD DIRECTS SOME PANTHERS TO ATTACK. ALSO SOMETHING FEELS EXTREMELY WRONG WITH THE DIALOG, LIKE EVERYONE USES THE WRONG WORD A LOT? A BEER AND A SIZE, BEAR SNAKE, HOTSHOT, IT'S REALLY WEIRD! PS. I THINK THEY ARE ACTUALLY HURTING THE ANIMALS IN SOME SCENES AND THAT MAKES IT A LOT WORSE. 

 Replica [movie, mst3k] MOVIE BY THE BIRDEMIC GUY. I LOVE HOW MUCH THIS MOVIE RAMPS UP OVER TIME. LIKE IT'S FAIRLY DULL UNTIL THE CAR CRASH, THEN THE STALKING THE GIRLFRIEND PART IS FUNNY, THEN BY THE TIME IT GETS TO G WINE IT'S HILARIOUS. PS. I DON'T WATCH A LOT OF RIFFS FOR WHATEVER REASON BUT THIS IS REALLY TRUELY A PERFECT RIFTRACTS MOVIE

 Oddity [movie] MAYBE I JUST WATCHED THIS ON THE WRONG DAY OR SOMETHING? IT'S MY KIND OF MOVIE, IT'S SHOT BEAUTIFULLY, IT'S HIGHLY RATED, AND MOVIE STUFF I TEND TO AGREE WITH HIGHLY RECOMMENDED THIS AND I JUST DID NOT VIBE WITH IT. LIKE I COULD WATCH IT AND UNDERSTAND IT'S GOOD BUT JUST COULD NOT CARE ABOUT ANY OF IT.  PS. TOO FACEBLIND TO TELL TWO PEOPLE ARE THE SAME ACTRESS PLAYING TWINS.