Posts

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga [movie]

 Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga [movie] I KNOW THIS MOVIE WAS A HUGE FLOP BUT NOT BECAUSE IT WAS BAD (ALTHOUGH BOY THEY SHOULD NOT HAVE SHOW CLIPS FROM FURY ROAD AT THE END BECAUSE MAN THAT SHOWED OFF HOW MUCH BETTER THAT MOVIE LOOKED AND OOF AT THAT). SOMETHING WENT WRONG WITH THE ADVERTISING. IT CAME OUT WITHOUT ME HAVING EVER EVEN HEARD IT WAS COMING OUT AND IT'S BEEN OUT FOR A MONTH AND I STILL NEVER HAD SEEN A TRAILER OR A SCREEN SHOT OR ANYTHING. ALSO CHRIS HEMSWORTH WAS A LITTLE MARVELY AT TIMES. I FEEL LIKE THE SCRIPT HAD HIM AS HE ANTI-MAD MAX, SINCE HE HAD THE LEG BRACE AND HE WAS LIKE, THE END GAME OF TERMINAL CRAZY BUT THEN THEY GOT A BIG STAR SO THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH HIM. PS. THE BEST PART IS HOW THEY WENT "FALLOUT STOLE EVERYTHING FROM US" THEN JUST DID THEIR OWN WAR NEVER CHANGES SPEECH TO ONE UP THEM.  (THE REAL BEST PART IS I DON'T REMEMEBER THERE BEING A SCENE WHERE HISTORY MAN EVEN CHANGES SIDES, HE'S JUST KINDA THERE. I LIKE THE IDEA EV

The Wilds [book, audiobook]

 The Wilds [book, audiobook] THIS IS A BUNCH OF SHORT STORIES BY ONE AUTHOR. THE STORIES ARE PRETTY GOOD BUT BY FAR THE MOST INTERESTING THING IS HOW THE STORIES REUSE A LOT OF CHARACTERS/IDEAS/THEMES BUT NEVER FEEL LIKE THEY ARE IN CONVERSATION WITH EACHOTHER. SOMETHING ABOUT IT MAKES IT FEEL LIKE THESE WERE NOT WRITTEN WITH A COLLECTION IN MIND AND YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO NOTICE REPEATS. LIKE THERE IS TWO STORIES WHERE A WOMAN GOES TO A HEALTH SPA AND CHEATS ON HER BOYFRIEND, AND ONE IS SCI-FI THEMED AND ONE IS CAVEMAN THEMED AND THAT VERY MUCH FEELS LIKE THE TWO STORIES SHOULD GO TOGETHER. BUT THEY REALLY JUST SEEM LIKE THEY WERE WRITTEN SEPARATE AND READING BOTH IS NOT ALLOWED OR SOMETHING.  EVERY PRE-TEEN GIRL HAS ONE BREAST BIGGER THAN THE OTHER AND WATCHED ELEPHANT MAN.  PS. THE STORIES ARE ALL EXTREMEMLY PREMISE HEAVY AND SO A LOT SET UP A SITUATION AND JUST ABRUPTLY END, AND THAT FEELS GOOD ON ANY ONE STORY WHERE IT'S LIKE "WOW, ALL THESE POSSIBILITIES" AND Y

Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths Part Two [movie]

  Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths Part Two [movie] THIS WAS GOOD ENOUGH BUT WATCHING IT MADE ME FEEL CRAZY, LIKE IT WAS A MOVIE THAT MOSTLY LOOKED FINE BUT HAD WEIRD RANDOM ANIMATION ERRORS? I FEEL LIKE I DON'T USUALLY NOTICE/CARE ABOUT STUFF LIKE THAT BUT THIS HAD SO MUCH LIKE "GUY WALKS TOWARDS THE CAMERA AND SCALES WRONG" OR SOMEONE HAVING CRAZY LEGS IN A WALK CYCLE OR LIKE A COUPLE BACKGROUNDS LOOKING LIKE SOMEONE MADE THEM IN MS PAINT AND IT WAS MAKING IT FEEL IMPOSSIBLE TO WATCH. PS. I THINK BECAUSE 'ANIMAL MAN' IS LIKE THE ONLY FULL COMIC SERIES I EVER READ I AM SUPER EXCITED WHENEVER PSYCHO PIRATE DOES ANYTHING AND I LOVE THEY ADDED A PREMISE PSYCHO PIRATE MAKES UP STUPID CODE NAMES  AND THAT IS A CHARACTER TRAIT HE HAS AND THAT IS WHY THE ANTI-MONITOR'S NAME NEVER MADE ANY SENSE. 

Mondo Cane [movie, nonfiction]

 Mondo Cane [movie, nonfiction] OH! I GET IT! I KNEW THIS MOVIE GENRE WAS CALLED "MONDO" AND I ABSTRACTLY KNEW MONDO WAS 'WORLD' IN ITALIAN AND THIS IS THE FIRST MONDO FILM AND IT'S THAT IT'S THAT IT'S STUFF FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD, NOT JUST RANDOM STORIES. THIS IS PAINFULLY OBVIOUS BUT IT'S NOT LIKE I WAS WATCHING FACES OF DEATH WORKING OUT WHY IT'S A MONDO FILM. ALSO: MONDO FILMS SUCK, IT'S FUNNY THIS IS THE FIRST ONE AND IT'S BETTER THAN EVERY OTHER ONE AND SOMEHOW LESS RACIST DESPITE BEING 20 YEARS EARLIER THAN MOST OF THEM BUT ALL THESE SUCK AND AREN'T GOOD AND THEY FELT LIKE A HUGE BIG DEAL IN THE EARLY 2000S WHEN THE INTERNET MADE THESE CRAZY TABOO MOVIES SEMI-ACCESSABLE BUT THEY ARE JUST NOTHING.  PS. I LIKE THAT THIS IS ITALIAN SO AMERICA GETS TO BE IN THE LIST OF FOREIGN COUNTRIES AND IT'S LIKE, THE THING WHERE HAWAII GIVES YOU A LAI WHEN YOU VISIT, WOMEN WORK OUT AT GYMS, BIKINI LADIES DISTRACT SAILORS,  PET CEMETERIES

Bad Biology [movie]

 Bad Biology [movie] TOO BORING TO TALK ABOUT PS. SEVEN CLITORISES, ~THAT I KNOW OF~

The Marvels [movie]

 The Marvels [movie] IT FEELS LIKE THEY TOOK A PIECE OF PAPER AND WROTE DOWN IDEAS THAT COULD BE IN A MOVIE THEN JUST FILMED THAT OUTLINE INSTEAD OF MAKING AN ACTUAL MOVIE. LIKE, THE POSITION FLIPPING STUFF WAS AN AWESOME IDEA AND I CAN IMAGINE HOW YOU'D MAKE AN AMAZING FIGHT SCENE OUT OF THAT, BUT THEY JUST KINDA NEVER DO? (ALSO THE WHOLE SETUP WITH THE BRACERS FEELS LIKE THE SWITCH SHOULD BE MARVEL, KAMALA THEN THE BAD GUY, IT FEELS SO SET UP FOR THAT AND THAT'D BE AN EVEN COOLER FIGHT) THEN THEY GO TO A PLANET WHERE EVERYONE CAN ONLY SING AND IMMEDIATELY GO "OH, THIS GUY DOESN'T SING" AND THEN NEVER SING AGAIN?   LIKE EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS FEELS IMMEDIATELY DROPPED. ALSO THE BAD GUY FEELS LIKE THE GOOD GUY IN THE STORY AND IT FEELS LUCKY THIS MOVIE CAME OUT JUST LONG ENOUGH AGO AND FAILED ENOUGH TO GET OUT OF PUBLIC CONSCIOUSNESS TO NOT BE 6 MONTHS OF CONSTANT ARTICLES ON IF MARVEL OR HAMMER LADY REPRESENTED PALESTINE OR ISRAEL MORE.  PS. CAT EGGS

Prey [game]

 Prey [game] THIS IS A FIRST PERSON METROIDVANIA. THIS IS THE ONLY FIRST PERSON METROIDVANIA GAME I CAN THINK OF? EVEN THE FIRST PERSON METROID GAMES WEREN'T METROIDVANIA GAMES AS MUCH AS THIS WAS? WHY ISN'T THAT MORE OF A GENRE? THIS GAME WAS NEAT AND FUN.  PS. I NEVER PLAY 'CONTROLLER GAMES' ON THE PC, SO THE STEAMDECK IS MAKING ME PLAY ALL THE GAMES I GOT FOR FREE OVER THE YEARS FROM STUFF SO I'M GONNA RUN THROUGH THE HITS OF LIKE 6 YEARS AGO.