Capital Reviews

 Vanishing World [book, audiobook] I LIKE THIS BOOK A LOT. IT STARTS OFF AS A KIND OF GENERIC "YOUNG PEOPLE IN JAPAN ARE DATING AND HAVING LESS SEX WHAT IF IN THE FUTURE THEY DIDN'T DATE OR HAVE SEX AT ALL, HUH!?" AND FELT LIKE IT WAS GOING TOWARDS BEING A WEIRD CONSERVATIVE GRIPE BOOK. IT THEN WENT THROUGH A SERIES OF DYSTOPIAN NEAR FUTURE ALTERNATE FAMILY STRUCTURES.  THE MAIN ONE BEING A WORLD EVERYONE GETS MARRIED AND YOUR WIFE IS FAMILY, AND HAVING SEX WITH FAMILY IS INCEST SO YOU HAVE TO DATE SOMEONE ELSE. AND I LIKE IT BECAUSE IT WAS A BLATANTLY STUPID IDEA BUT THE BOOK DID SUCH A GOOD JOB JUSTIFYING IT MAKING SENSE AS A THING PEOPLE WOULD DO. ALSO IT HAD GAY MARRIAGE BE ILLEGAL BECAUSE WITHOUT SEX MEN WOULD ONLY MARRY MEN BECAUSE MEN HATE WOMEN. THE GENERAL CONCLUSION ALSO WAS GOOD BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE 'HEY, THESE FUTURES SEEM REALLY BAD AND DYSTOPIAN AND I THINK THEY ARE, BUT LIKE, IF I GREW UP AND IT'D ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY I'D THINK THE CURRENT WAY WE...

 Bumpy [movie] I DON'T EVEN HAVE A STEREOTYPE ABOUT WHAT AN ESTONIAN MOVIE IS BUT THIS IS CLEARLY THE MOST ESTONIAN MOVIE POSSIBLE. HONESTLY IT'S VERY WACKY BUT A LITTLE LESS WACKY THAN IT APPEARS BECAUSE IT IS VERY FAIRY TALE AND STICKS PRETTY WELL TO FAIRY TALE TYPE STUFF HAPPENING. I WILL SAY I REALLY LIKE HOW ANTI-SPANKING THIS MOVIE IS. IT HAS A WEIRD FAMILY GUY CUT AWAY TYPE SONG ABOUT NOT HITTING YOUR KIDS AND HOW LOVE IS BETTER THAN FEAR AND THEY CUT TO IT LIKE, 5 TIMES IN 10 MINUTES.  PS. I FEEL LIKE I COULD JUST SUBSCRIBE TO ETERNAL FAMILY, BUT I DON'T WANT THAT. I THINK IT WOULD FEEL REALLY BAD TO JUST SEE ALL OBSCURE WEIRDO MOVIES ALL AT ONCE LIKE THAT. I LIKE WHAT THEY ARE DOING VERY MUCH, BUT IT SEEMS LIKE TOO MUCH FOR ME. 

 Obsession [movie] THIS IS A GOOD HORROR MOVIE. I KINDA HOPE IT DOESN'T GET POPULAR BECAUSE I CAN JUST IMAGINE THE ONLINE DISCOURSE THIS MOVIE WOULD MAKE. LIKE IT'S A MOVIE WITH THE CORE 'WOULDN'T IT BE SCARY TO HAVE AN ABUSIVE GIRLFRIEND' AND I JUST KNOW HOW THE MANOSPHERE AND INCEL IDIOTS WILL GO WITH THAT BUT IT'S ALSO A MOVIE THAT IS EXTREMELY ON THE ABSOLUTE BODY HORROR BEING THE PERSON STRIPPED OF WILL AND FORCED TO BE A PRISONER IN YOUR OWN BODY AND I CAN JUST IMAGINE THE "WELL, IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT NIKKI IS THE REAL VICTIMS" POSTS, LIKE NO SHIT, THAT WAS WHAT THE MOVIE ALSO WAS. I DON'T KNOW. I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN THIS CONVERSATION ANYWHERE. I CAN JUST SEE IT IN MY MIND SO CLEARLY I'M PRE-ANNOYED BY THIS THING I MADE UP.  PS. I LIKE THE WAY THE IT MADE FUN OF THE NEEDFUL THINGS TYPE STORE. I LIKE THE CONCEPT THAT WISHING WAS JUST STRAIGHTFORWARDLY REAL IN THIS WORLD BUT WAS LIKE, A FAD FROM THE 80S. LIKE WHEN THEY SHOWED THE SEARCH O...

 Buffet Infinity [movie, amazing] I *REALLY* LIKE THIS. CONCEPTUALLY IT'S JUST THE SAME SORT OF THING AS "TOO MANY COOKS" OR "THIS HOUSE HAS PEOPLE IN IT" (OR EVEN NIGHTVALE KELLOGG'S) BUT THAT IS A NEW ENOUGH GENRE THERE IS A LOT OF ROOM FOR NEW STUFF.  I LIKE HOW MOST OF THE COMMERCIALS GO ELDITCH INSANE BUT YOU CAN TELL LAWYER GUY IS JUST REGULAR WRONG AND AMMED IS JUST GOING MUNDANE CRAZY.  I DON'T KNOW, I REALLY LIKE THIS GENRE A LOT. (I THINK THE ACTUAL BUFFET INFINITY COMMERICALS WERE A LITTLE TOO SILLY AND I WISH THEY HAD KEPT THE SAME SILLY LEVEL AS THE OTHER STUFF BECAUSE THAT FELT LIKE IT WORKED, BUT THIS MOVIE RULED ANYWAY) PS. I LIKE HOW YOU CAN TELL ALL OF NORTH AMERICA SPAWNED THE EXACT SAME LOCAL COMMERICALS AT EXACTLY THE SAME TIME. WINTERPORT BOOT ALIEN. 

 C.H.U.D [movie] THIS IS LIKE, MOVIE I'VE KNOWN ABOUT FOREVER THAT I DON'T THINK I HAVE EVER SEEN A SINGLE FRAME OF. I GUESS MOSTLY BECAUSE IT'S REALLY NOT MUCH OF A MOVIE AND THE TITLE AND BOX ART WAS THE MAIN THING PEOPLE LIKED. SOME OF THE DIALOG WAS VERY CHARMING AT LEAST? BUT MEH. PS. THE MOST INTERESTING THING WAS THE WEIRD ANSWERING MACHINE DEVICE HE HAD. DID THAT EVER EXIST???

 A Parade of Horribles [book, audiobook] LOTS OF THINGS HAPPENED, ESPECIALLY NEAR THE END, BUT THIS IS DEFINITELY THE FILLER BOOK BETWEEN THE FACTION WARS AND ASCENSION STUFF. WHERE THE GAME STUFF HAS ZERO IMPACT AND MOST OF THE FIRST 75% WAS JUST WORKING OUT VARIOUS WAYS TO CUT THE ONE MILLION CHARACTERS THE STORY HAD TO A SMALLER NUMBER WITHOUT JUST KILLING EVERYONE. STILL GOOD THOUGH, IT'S EXTREMELY HILARIOUS THE AUDIO BOOK ACTUALLY GOES FOR IT WITH THE "TAKE ME ON' STUFF. IT'S A LITTLE ANNOYING THIS IS GOING KINGDOM HEARTS OF HAVING STORY BEATS TAKE PLACE IN RERELEASE VERSIONS OF OLDER BOOKS (STORY BEATS ALSO HAPPEN IN THE ADS FOR AUDIO BOOKS, THAT SEEM TO BE CANONICAL BUT DON'T YET COME UP IN THE MAIN STORY).  PS. I HAVE A VERY POINTLESS CONSPIRACY THEORY THAT WHEN THEY ARE ALL STUCK IN THE WHAT IF ROOMS THEY SAY A REALLY AWKWARD SENTENCE, I AM NOT GOING TO BOTHER TO LOOK IT UP, BUT HE SAY SOMETHING LIKE "IT'S LIKE A VIRAL SWAMP" OR SOMETHING. AN...