Capital Reviews

I HAVE READ THE BOOK SO I KNEW BIOSHOCK WAS BASED PARTLY ON THIS STORY BUT HOLY CRAP I HAD NO IDEA HOW DIRECTLY IT WAS BASED DIRECTLY AFTER THIS SPECIFIC DISNEY ADAPTATION. PS. ALSO I ONLY KNEW THAT 20,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA REFERRED TO LENGTH TRAVELED INSTEAD OF DEPTH DUE THAT MID 90S SNL SKIT WITH KELSEY GRAMMER. AND NOW I KNOW WHY THE GUY IN THAT SKIT SAYS THE WORD LEAGUES SO WEIRD.

I AM STARTING TO GET SUPER SELF CONSCIOUS ABOUT THESE MOVIES I WATCH AS BACKGROUND NOISE AND I MEAN IT'S NOT LIKE I ACTUALLY HAVE TO ALWAYS WRITE THESE DOWN BUT IT'S CHEATING NOT TO BUT NOW I LOOK LIKE I HAVE TERRIBLE TASTE IN MOVIES BECAUSE THIS WHOLE BLOG EXISTS TO SHOW GIRLS OR SOMETHING I GUESS? PS. THE DOCTOR DOOM FIGHT AT THE END LOOKS LIKE IT'S FROM 1992.

OH GOD, YOU KNOW THAT FORMULA FOR MOVIES THAT IS LIKE ET WHERE A KID BEFRIENDS SOMETHING AND LEARNS THE MEANING OF FRIENDSHIP? THAT WAS THIS MOVIE BUT A KID BEFRIENDS A LIVING VACUUM CLEANER AND IT'S THE BEST THING. IT'S NOT EVEN A PARODY OR ANYTHING IT'S JUST AWFUL! PS. ALTHOUGH SOMEONE'S NAME IS RICHARD SUCK SO WHO EVEN KNOWS???

I MEAN I GUESS THE POINT WAS BECAUSE VIRTUALLY EVERYONE IN THIS MOVIE DIES EVENTUALLY BUT I DON'T THINK I CAN THINK OF A MOVIE THAT HAD MORE UNRELENTINGLY UNLIKABLE CHARACTERS. I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN THINK OF A MOVIE WITH MORE RAPISTS PER CAPITA. PS. YET ANOTHER VICTIM IN 'AWFUL MOVIES I'M WATCHING TO PROVIDE BACKGROUND NOISE TO HANDHELD VIDEOGAME PLAYING"

THIS MOVIE WAS WEIRD BECAUSE THE FOREST SEEMED ACTUALLY FOR REAL BAD AND THE BAD GUYS WERE POLLUTING BUT SEEMED TO AT LEAST HAVE THE RIGHT IDEA AND THE VOLCANO SEEMED ABSOLUTELY GOOD AS LONG AS THEY WEREN'T GOING TO USE IT IN THE MIDDLE OF A CITY. ALSO I FEEL LIKE MAYBE I WATCHED THIS BEFORE YEARS AGO AND FORGOT ABOUT WATCHING IT? PS. BUT MAYBE I'M JUST THINKING OF GREEN LEGEND RAN, WHICH IS A MOVIE THAT TOOK ME ABOUT AN HOUR TO REMEMBER THE NAME OF.

I REALLY REALLY LIKED THIS SHOW FOR A WHILE BUT THEN THERE WAS LIKE TEN TRILLION CHARACTERS AND A BUNCH OF SIDE PLOTS THAT WENT NO WHERE AT ALL. I DON'T THINK THERE IS A SINGLE PERSON ON EARTH ASKING FOR A REBOOT OF STATIC SHOCK AND APACHE CHIEF FROM WONDERFRIENDS AND I AM GLAD THIS GOT CANCELED SO I DON'T HAVE TO WATCH ANYMORE. PS. I LIKE THAT GL AMBIGUOUSLY KILLED OFF AYA FOR A FINALE, BUT THIS SHOW JUST KILLED OFF KID FLASH BECAUSE YOU COULD TELL THEY WERE LIKE "GOD WE HAVE A LOT OF FLASHES ON THIS SHOW, CAN'T WE LOSE A FEW OF THEM?"

I DON'T KNOW, THIS SHOW WASN'T REALLY VERY GOOD BUT WHEN I HEARD IT WAS ENDING I WATCHED LIKE EVERY EPISODE A FEW WEEKS AGO THEN WATCHED THE LAST FEW AS THEY CAME OUT. THE FIRST SEASON WAS OKAY, IT BASICALLY RIPPED OFF THE PLOT FROM AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER BUT THE SECOND SEASON WAS MOSTLY BAD EXCEPT THE PART THEY ASKED "THAT FAKE NEWS GUY' ABOUT JOHN STEWARD AND THE WEIRD SCI-FI CHRISTIAN START OF THE UNIVERSE. PS. I ALWAYS WANT TO LIKE GREEN LANTERN BECAUSE IT'S TOTALLY JUST SPIRAL ENERGY EXCEPT THEY ONLY EVER USE IT FOR LAME STUFF LIKE SPORTS EQUIPMENT. NO ONE EVER MAKES A VERY GOOD GREEN LANTERN STORY.