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M3gan [movie]

 M3gan [movie] YOU ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THIS WAS WRITTEN BY THE SAME GUY THAT WROTE MALIGNANT. HOWEVER SILLY YOU THINK THIS MOVIE MIGHT BE, IT IS SO MUCH SILLIER THAN THAT. (ALTHOUGH THE DANCE *DOES* FEEL LIKE IT EXISTS JUST TO MAKE A TRIALER OUT OF IT.). THIS MOVIE RULES THE SAME WAY MALIGNANT DOES, FOR SURE.  PS. I DO KINDA FEEL LIKE THERE IS TWO WRITERS AND YOU CAN KINDA FEEL THE BONES OF THE ALTERNATE STORY WHERE KATIE IS THE KILLER. LIKE THE WHOLE THEMATIC THROUGH LINE IS YOU NEED TO BE A PARENT AND YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE A KID WITH TECHNOLOGY AND HOPE IT ALL WORKS OUT, AND THAT SORT OF MESSAGE TIES INTO MOST OF THE MAJOR STORY BEATS, BUT KATIE NEVER REALLY DOES MUCH, IT DOESN'T FIT IF IT'S THE "SCREEN" KILLING EVERYONE. EVERYTHING IS SO OVER THE TOP JUST HAVING A SUPER BASIC EVIL ROBOT MOVIE THAT THEY SPEED THROUGH AT A MILLION MILES PER HOUR AND SPEND ZERO THOUGHT ON WORKS WELL FOR THE SILLEST MOVIE EVER THOUGH. 

Junji Ito Maniac: Japanese Tales of the Macabre [anime]

 Junji Ito Maniac: Japanese Tales of the Macabre [anime] I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS WITH ALL MY HEART. IT FEELS LIKE ANY TIME THE ANIMATION HAD A CHOICE HOW TO DEPICT ANYTHING THEY TOOK THE WORST POSSIBLE OPTION. THAT SOUNDS LIKE A NEGETIVE, BUT IT'S NOT. JUNJI ITO TRANSLATIONS TO ANIMATION NORMALLY KINDA SUCK, HIS COMICS ARE MORE ABOUT A PREMISE AND A VIBE AND A CERTAIN NUMBER OF SPECIFIC HORROR PANELS AND EVERYTHING ELSE IS CONNECTIVE TISSUE BETWEEN THOSE THINGS. MOST ADAPTATIONS TRY TO FLESH OUT THE LOOSE CONNECTIONS AND END UP WATERING EVERYTHING DOWN. THIS TRANSLATED EVERYTHING IN A WEIRDLY HYPER LITERAL WAY. LIKE THERE IS SO MANY PLACES THE ORIGINAL STORY IS LIKE 5 PAGES LONG SO A BUNCH OF INDETERMINATE TIME IS MEANT TO BE PASSING BETWEEN PANELS. IN THIS THERE IS TONS OF EXAMPLES OF SOMEONE ENDING A CONVERSATION THEN IMMEDIATELY WITH NO PAUSE STARTING THE NEXT CONVERSATION, EVEN THOUGH IN THE COMIC YOU'D CLEARLY ASSUME IT WAS DAYS OR WEEKS LATER THAT HAPPENED. OR LIKE, THERE

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery [movie]

 Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery [movie] I HAVE A PRETTY BAD THING WHERE I CAN'T WATCH MOVIES ONCE ENOUGH PEOPLE SAY IT'S GOOD. I BOUNCED OFF THE FIRST ONE AND THEN THAT MADE THIS ONE DOUBLE IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT DOWN AND WATCH. BUT YEAH, IT IS A GOOD MOVIE.  PS. IT DOES A GOOD JOB OF MENTIONING THINGS EARLIER THEN THEM COMING UP LATER, WHICH IS ALL A MYSTERY NEEDS TO BE GOOD. 

Mystery of the Kingdom of God [movie]

 Mystery of the Kingdom of God  [movie] OH MAN, THIS MOVIE RULES SO MUCH. IT'S A ZERO BUDGET DIRECT TO VIDEO CHRISTIAN MOVIE WITH EXTREME ANIME SENSIBILITIES. LIKE I THINK IT'S LITERALLY SOMEONE WATCHING DEVILMAN CRYBABY AND TRYING TO REMAKE THAT BUT FOR CHRISTIANS AND IT'S JUST INSAINE, IT'S LIKE, A SCENE THEY ARE FIGHTING A VERY RACIST DEPICTION OF A WITCHDOCTOR BY PRAYING FOR HIM THEN THE MAIN CHARACTER JUST PULLS OUT A HANDGUN, IT RULES, I SAID "THIS MOVIE FUCKING RULES" LIKE 5 MINUTES IN. ALSO I LEGITIMATELY LOVE THE "LUST" DEMON, HE WAS TOO COOL FOR LUST AND SO HER TACTIC WAS TO.... REPEATEDLY MISCHARGE HIS CREDIT CARD TO DONATE TO ORPHANS UNTIL HE GOT ANGRY.  PS. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ACTUAL SPECIFIC RELIGION THIS, IT HAD A HUGE FOCUS ON THE (MALE) MAIN CHARACTER BECOMING A "BRIDE OF CHRIST" AND NEEDING TO GET A SPECIAL SECOND BAPTISM. IT SEEMS LIKE THIS MIGHT BE FROM CHINA, BUT ALSO IT MIGHT BE OUTSOURCING TO CHINA IS HOW YOU GET A MO

White Noise [movie]

 White Noise [movie] MAN, I DO NOT FEEL LIKE I'VE HATED A MOVIE THIS MUCH IN A LONG TIME. I FEEL LIKE I AM THE EXACT TARGET AUDIENCE FOR SUPER PRETENTIOUS/ARTSY MOVIES BUT I COULD NOT STAND THIS AT ALL. YOU CAN TELL WHAT SORT OF THEMES THEY ARE HEADING FOR BUT NONE OF THEM FEEL LIKE THEY GO ANYWHERE. IT'S LIKE AN AI JUST GRABBED THINGS THAT ARE IN A SMART MOVIE AND RANDOMLY THREW THEM IN WITH NO DEEPER THOUGHT.  PS. *ARE* MOUNTAINS MORE LIKELY TO BE UPSTATE? IT FEELS LIKE YOU WOULDN'T MAKE A STATE WITH THE MOUNTAINS IN THE MIDDLE. 

Catopolis [television?]

Catopolis [television?] OH OKAY.  PS. https://youtu.be/xYnv8tHyOJE

Tiny Tina's Wonderland [game]

 Tiny Tina's Wonderland [game] I FEEL LIKE I HAVE SUCH MIXED FEELINGS ABOUT BORDERLAND GAMES. IT'S LIKE THE SERIES I'VE PLAYED THE MOST OF THAT I WOULDN'T SAY I LIKE. IT'S LIKE, ALWAYS ALMOST GOOD BUT NOT QUITE. LIKE, BLUE HAT AND KSARA WERE EXTREMELY GOOD PARTS, AND LIKE, THE GAME TOOK A LITTLE TIME OUT TO HAVE A REALLY WELL THOUGHT OUT AND PRESEPTIVE DISCUSSION ON WHY SOME PEOPLE LIKE RULES LIGHT TABLE TOP RPGS AND WHY SOME PEOPLE LIKE RULES HEAVY GAMES BUT THEN A LOT OF THE REST OF IT WAS JUST "HEY REMEMBER BUTT STATILION? REMEMBER HOW THAT WASN'T THAT FUNNY THE FIRST TIME? NOW WE HAVE IT AS A MAIN CHARACTER!" PS. THE ENDING WAS WEIRD AND BAD BUT THEN IMMEDIATELY AFTER A TEXT SCREEN CAME UP THAT WAS LIKE 'WE MADE THIS GAME FROM HOME DURING THE PANDEMIC SO OKAY". ALSO IT FELT LIKE IT WAS FRAMING THE ENDING AS YOU STABBING/FIGHTING TINY TINA AND I GET WHY THEY DIDN'T DO THAT BUT IT REALLY FELT LIKE THAT IS WHERE IT WAS GOING.