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Showing posts from January, 2021

Yamasong: March of the Hollows [movie]

 Yamasong: March of the Hollows [movie] THIS MOVIE IS FINE. I LIKED IT. IT'S FINE. I'M SO SAD IT'S NOT GREAT. IT HAD LITERALLY EVERYTHING GOING FOR IT TO BE THE MOST AMAZING MOVIE AND IT'S JUST NOT. IT FEELS SO LESS THAN THE SUM OF IT'S PARTS. I ENJOYED WATCHING IT AND WILL NEVER THINK ABOUT IT AGAIN AFTER I TYPE THIS UP THEN PROBABLY HAVE A DREAM THAT STEALS IT'S STYLE LATER TONIGHT.  PS. I FEEL LITERALLY CRAZY FOR SAYING THIS, BECAUSE ALL MY PROOF OF THIS CLAIM IS ABSURD, BUT DID THIS JUST STEAL EVERYTHING FROM FINAL FANTASY 13? I FEEL LIKE EVERY SINGLE THING I WANT TO NAME HERE IS SO GENERIC, BUT THE ARTIFICAL MOON, THE MISSING GOD, THE RAGNOROKESQ BEAST FREEZING INTO A PILLAR. EVEN THE USE OF THE ENTIRELY REAL BUT NOT OFTEN SAID WORD "TERRAPIN" IT REALLY ALL FEELS LIKE TOO MUCH, BUT THAT SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE. 

The Dip [book, nonfiction]

 The Dip [book, nonfiction] I THINK 'BOOK ABOUT SOMETHING THAT SCARES YOU' IS REALLY SUPPOSED TO BE A BOOK WITH A BIG SPIDER OR SOMETHING BUT I WENT WITH A SELF HELP BOOK. SINCE APPARENTLY WHAT SCARES ME IS EVER QUITTING THIS JOB AND MOVING ON. I DON'T KNOW THAT THIS BOOK IS THE MAGIC KEY THAT IS CHANGING THAT, BUT IT'S NOT A TERRIBLE BOOK. I DO LIKE THE CONCEPT THAT YOU SHOULDN'T FIND A JOB YOU ARE GOOD AT BECAUSE THAT MEANS OTHER PEOPLE ARE PROBABLY GOOD OR BETTER, BUT INSTEAD YOU SHOULD FIND JOBS THAT YOU ARE BAD AT THAT EVERYONE IS BAD AT THAT YOU CAN BE BETTER THAN THEM. IT'S MOSTLY JUST STANDARD ADVICE THOUGH, DON'T STAY IN DEADENDS, DON'T GIVE UP TOO EARLY BUT DON'T GET ALL SUNK COST, ECT.  PS. OVER THIS WHOLE BOOK I JUST REALLY STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT 'THE DIP' IS SUPPOSED TO BE, HE EXPLAINS IT CLEARLY RIGHT OFF THEN EVERY OTHER CHAPTER SEEMS LIKE HE'S USING IT TO MEAN LIKE 8 DIFFERENT THINGS. IT'S NEVER HARD TO FOLLOW WHAT

Voyage of the Rock Aliens [movie]

 Voyage of the Rock Aliens [movie] WHY ISN'T THIS WAY MORE OF A CULT HIT?? I HAVE NEVER EVEN HEARD OF THIS BEFORE TODAY, THIS MOVIE IS GREAT. IT EVEN HAS OPTIMUS PRIME IN IT.  PS. SOME OF THE MUSIC VIDEOS WERE THE WEAKEST PART OF THIS BUT 'NATURE OF THE BEAST' IS DOWNRIGHT AMAZING AND THE BEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN. 

Cosmic Slop [movie]

 Cosmic Slop [movie] SO THIS WAS A FAILED HBO PILOT FOR A TWILIGHT ZONE STYLE SHOW ABOUT BLACK PEOPLE AND MINORITIES THAT THEY TOOK THE EXISTING EPISODES AND MADE INTO A MOVIE. AND JESUS CHRIST WAS THE FIRST SEGMENT EXTREMELY WORTH WATCHING. IT JUST HITS THIS ABSOLUTE PERFECT MIX OS UNBELIEVABLY BAD 1994 CGI,  WEIRD 90S POLITICS AND A VERY VERY STILL RELEVANT PLOTLINE. A BUNCH OF ALIENS SHOW UP IN CGI SPACE BOATS AND SAY "IF YOU GIVE US ALL YOUR BLACK PEOPLE WE WILL GIVE YOU FREE ENERGY AND CURE POVERTY AND DISEASE" WITHOUT SAYING WHAT THEY'D DO TO THEM OR WHY JUST BLACK PEOPLE AND THEN THE PRESIDENT ENDS UP PUTTING IT TO A PUBLIC VOTE. AND THE SEGMENT IS JUST THE GOVERNMENTAL MEETINGS AND INFOMERCIALS AND TALK SHOWS AND CONVERSATIONS OF AMERICA DECIDING WHAT TO DO. IT'S EXTREMELY SOMETHING THAT COULD BE MADE TODAY.  PS. THE OTHER TWO SEGMENTS SUCKED, THE SECOND ONE WAS MOSTLY CONFUSING AND BORING AND THE THIRD ONE WAS PRETTY GROSS TONE WISE AND WAS JUST "WHAT IF

Ready Player Two [book]

Ready Player Two [book] I FEEL LIKE IT'S RARE FOR A BOOK TO BE SO BAD IT'S GOOD, BUT THIS KINDA IS THAT. I FEEL LIKE A HIPSTER SAYING THAT BECAUSE I'M CLEARLY THE DEMOGRAPHIC THAT IS SUPPOSED TO LIKE THIS BOOK, AND THEN I DID LIKE THIS BOOK, BUT I MEAN COME ON, IT'S AWFUL. BUT IT'S SO AWFUL IT LOOPS AROUND TO BEING AMAZING. LIKE THE WRITING IS SO BAD THERE ARE PARTS I THINK THEY MUST BE MAKING IT BAD ON PURPOSE OR SOMETHING. LIKE THE PART WHERE THE ADULT TRILLIONARE MAIN CHARACTER IS TALKING ABOUT HOW HOT A TEENAGE GIRL IS AND THEN USES HIS TRILLIONARE POWERS TO GO THROUGH THEIR MEDICAL RECORDS TO FIND OUT THEY ARE TRANSGENDERED THEN USE SECRET CAMERAS IN THE TEENS HOUSE TO FIND OUT THEY ARE SO IMPOVERISHED THAT THEY ARE SITTING IN AN EMPTY ROOM WITH THEIR RIBS SHOWING FROM HUNGER THEN HE GOES ON TO EXPLAIN HE'D STILL HAVE SEX WITH HER? WHY WOULD YOU WRITE ANY OF THAT LIKE THAT. IT FELT LIKE AN INSANE THING TO WRITE.  (THEY WROTE IT THAT WAY BECAUSE IN THE FIRST

The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special [movie]

The Lego Star Wars Holiday Special [movie] THIS SUCKED, IT DIDN'T EVEN SUCK IN A GOOD WAY. IT FEELS LIKE SOMEONE WROTE DOWN "STAR WARS CHRISTMAS CAROL" ON A PEICE OF PAPER THEN FORGOT WHAT THEY WERE DOING AND VAUGELY MADE THIS AND DID A BAD JOB. THE ONLY GOOD PART WAS YODA'S OUTFIT AT THE VERY END.  PS. DOES ANYONE ELSE HAVE A WEIRD HOLLOW FEELING LIKE IT HASN'T BEEN CHRISTMAS YET, AND IT'S STILL JUST GONNA HAPPEN LATER? 

Soul [movie]

 Soul [movie] I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS MOVIE. MAYBE I WATCHED IT AT JUST THE RIGHT TIME BUT IT REALLY RESONATED WITH ME A TON. I DON'T THINK IT WILL CHANGE MY LIFE OR ANYTHING, BUT IT'S A MOVIE WITH A PRETTY UNIQUE SET OF MESSAGES AND I REALLY LIKED IT.  I FEEL LIKE WHOEVER MADE THE LOST SOULS AND THE PEOPLE IN FLOW THE SAME THING WAS LIKE, ON SOME WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF PHILOSOPHY. ALSO THEY MADE A BUNCH OF BABIES SAY HELL A BUNCH OF TIMES. PS. I LIKE THAT THE MYSTICS WERE JUST OPENLY HIGH AS FRIG. THEY DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO PRETEND THAT WASN'T WHAT IT WAS. 

Wild Mountain Thyme [movie]

 Wild Mountain Thyme [movie] YES I PAID 10 DOLLARS TO WATCH THIS. IS THAT WORTH IT? I DON'T KNOW. THIS MOVIE MAKING WAVES SOLELY BASED AS A BAD MOVIE WITH AN EXTREMELY BONKERS ENDING AND IT DOES EXTREMELY HAVE THAT, BUT ALSO I ALREADY KNEW THE ENDING SO IT WASN'T AS BIG A SURPRISE. ALTHOUGH I THINK IT DOES TURN OUT FUNNY HOW ABSOLUTELY MUCH THIS IS JUST A DULL ROMANTIC DRAMA UNTIL THE LAST COUPLE MINUTES.  LIKE I EXPECTED IT TO BE MORE OFF, SO EVEN IF IT WASN'T BUILDING UP TO THE ENDING IT AT LEAST WOULD BE IN TONE.  PS. I FEEL LIKE MAYBE THEY DIRECTED THIS MOVIE WRONG? LIKE IF YOU SHOWED ANTONY AS MENTALLY ILL OR MILDLY AUTISTIC OR SOMETHING IT MAKES MORE SENSE. HE DID A COUPLE WEIRD THINGS BUT THE ACTOR ALWAYS PLAYED HIM AS THE ABSOLUTE MOST DULL PERSON POSSIBLE SO THERE IS NO REASON TO NEED A WEIRD TWIST. ALSO I FEEL LIKE THE WHOLE NON-TWIST PLOT WOULD HAVE MADE SOME SENSE IF THEY EVER SHOWED THE FAMILIES FEUDING OR SOMETHING, THE TWO FAMILES JUST HANG OUT IN EACHOTHER&#

She's Allergic to Cats [movie]

 She's Allergic to Cats [movie] I REALLY LIKE WHAT THIS MOVIE WAS GOING. IT'S SO CLEARLY SUPPOSED TO BE A DAVID LYNCH MOVIE MADE BY WAY OF EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE. IT'S SLIGHTLY TOO BORING IN PLACES BECAUSE IT'S ONE OF THOSE MOVIES WHERE YOU KNOW THEY THOUGHT OF LIKE 4 SCENES THEN THE REST OF THE MOVIE IS TRYING TO FILL TIME BETWEEN THEM BUT STILL, HIM EXPLAINING HE USED TO OWN BANANAS BUT DOESN'T NOW IS VERY GOOD FILM MAKING. PS. I WISH I COULD WATCH CARRIE BUT CATS

Unknown Origins [movie]

Unknown Origins [movie] I FEEL LIKE SOME SORT OF COP BEING ALL SHOCKED BY A MOVIE NOT RESPECTING COPYRIGHT, BUT MAN THIS MOVIE REALLY GOES OUT OF IT'S WAY TO NOT RESPECT COPYRIGHT. I THINK IT HIT ME BECAUSE IT FELT AT FIRST LIKE THEY WERE TRYING TO DO VERY SLIGHT OFFBRAND, LIKE THEY WERE GOING TO EDGE RIGHT UP TO COPYRIGHT, BUT THEN LIKE, IT TURNED OUT THE MOVIE WAS JUST MORE NERD THAN I WAS AND IT WAS EVEN MORE ACCURATE THAN I WAS.  PS. I ALSO LIKE THEY HAD A CHARACTER IN IT JUST TO BE LIKE "ANIME TOO" EVEN THOUGH THAT DIDN'T FEEL LIKE THAT EVEN NEEDED TO BE THERE. AND IT WAS EVEN LIKE, GANTZ ANIME, NOT JUST SAILOR MOON OR SOMETHING. 

The Sisterhood [movie]

 The Sisterhood [movie] A REALLY AGRESSIVELY BORING MOVING WHERE EVERYONE SLOWLY SWORDFIGHTS TO MUSIC MADE ON AN APPLE II ABOUT A POST APOCOLYPTIC FUTURE WHERE MAGIC SUPERSOLDIER WOMEN CAN SHOOT LASERS OUT OF THEIR EYES AND TALK TO HAWKS.  PS THE APPEAL OF WATCHING THIS MOVIE IS IT BEING SET IN 2021. 

Repo! The Genetic Opera [MOVIE]

  Repo! The Genetic Opera [MOVIE] GOD I LIKE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH. IT'S ONE OF THOSE MOVIES I CLEARLY WOULD LOVE BUT THEN EVERYONE HYPED UP HOW MUCH I WOULD LIKE IT SO I AVOIDED FULLY WATCHING IT FOR LIKE A DECADE TO AVOID. OF COURSE I LIKE THIS MOVIE.  PS. PEOPLE LOVE TO DO THE THING WHERE THEY TALK ABOUT HOW THE 70S HAVE A LOOK AND THE 80S HAVE A LOOK AND SO ON THEN COMPLAIN THE 2000S DON'T, WHICH IS NOT TRUE AT ALL AND YOU CAN LOOK AT THIS MOVIE FOR A SECOND AND KNOW IT WAS MADE IN 2008

Adult Children of Alcoholics [book, nonfiction]

Adult Children of Alcoholics [book, nonfiction] DRUNK DAD, SO WHAT PS. LOL AT THE AUTHOR BEING SO PROUD THEY STOPPED THE LADY FROM BEING GAY

Dick Johnson is Dead [movie, Nonfiction]

 Dick Johnson is Dead [movie, Nonfiction] I THINK THIS MOVIE WAS QUITE WELL DONE, BUT I REALLY DIDN'T LIKE WATCHING IT. I MEAN THE SUBJECT MATTER IS REALLY SAD AND NOT FUN TO WATCH BUT I KINDA FELT LIKE THE GUY JUST WASN'T INTO THE 'FUNNY' SEGMENTS THAT WERE SUPPOSED TO LIGHTEN IT UP SO LIKE WATCHING A REAL SAD PART THEN LIKE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO FEEL BETTER BECAUSE THE DUMB FAKE BLOOD BUT THEN THEY SHOW THE GUY SUPER CONFUSED AND SCARED AT IT AND THAT ISN'T FUN.  PS. THE ONLY PART THAT WORKED WAS HIM WISHING FOR TOES AND THE CLOSEUP OF JESUS GIVING HIM TOES IN HEAVEN

Revolution of the Daleks [television]

 Revolution of the Daleks [television] THIS ISN'T BAD, I PAID 2.99 TO WATCH IT AND I'M NOT UNHAPPY WITH WATCHING IT BUT MAN DOES THIS EPISODE FEEL LIKE IT WAS SWEEPED UP ON THE FLOOR OF THE DOCTOR WHO SCRIPT FACTORY.  LIKE GOD, HOW MANY TIMES HAS THIS EXACT PLOT HAPPENED? IT WASN'T EVEN A HOLIDAY EPISODE! IT DID REMIND ME I HAVE NOT WATCHED MOST OF THE NEWEST SEASON AT ALL SO THAT IS EXCITING. I DO STILL LIKE DOCTOR WHO. PS. "WHERE DID THEY GET THE PURCHOUS ORDER NUMBERS" WAS THE BEST PART

Ghost Stories [movie]

 Ghost Stories [movie] I DON'T KNOW, I LIKE THIS, NONE OF THE STORIES WERE ACTUALLY ENTIRELY GOOD AND EVERY SINGLE ONE WAS DUMB IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER BUT THEY ALL SEEMED GENERALLY GOOD. I GASPED WHEN THE UNDERWARE FETUS GASPED (BUT LAUGHED AT THE CROW LADY). ALSO ONE HAD THE TWIST EVERYONE WAS CHRISTIAN AND THAT WAS LOL.  PS. 100 TOWN AND 20 TOWN.